Friday, April 20, 2012

The Art of Whoring

Just a quick note to one and all:  My humble offering of both parody and satire (sometimes not mutually exclusive), The Art of Whoring - Adventures in Prostitution - goes free for one day, tomorrow, April 21.  It is like no other book you've read or will read - I guarantee you that!  This book was turned into a script by yours truly and we begin shooting July 1, with locations both in the U.S. and Mexico.  I will co-direct with veteran producer/director, Yakov Bentsvi.  Yakov produced my first film "Bloodgames" in 1989.  We're aiming for an early 2013 release.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Aliens, and Vampires

Most of you are familiar with the introduction of my science-fiction novel, Mars, The Bringer of War.  It made its way into cosmic awareness in early March.  Now, almost five weeks later, I will be offering another free download of this book for your viewing pleasure.  Our sales were unexpectedly - and happily - high. I am now in process of writing the sequel, which will pick up in-flight back to the Milky Way by our hero, John Mars, currently in cryo-suspended animation.  What he finds upon awakening, however ... will be devastating.

I am reintroducing Monster Vice, released one week after Mars, The Bringer of War, because ... after a day of free downloads to the tune of more than 3,000, Amazon pulled one of its unintentional bug-a-boos by pulling the book from availability. By the time it was restored to the market, the download algorithm essentially evaporated, and many of you simply didn't know about the book's debut.

Monster Vice, to be frank, is my kookiest book to date.  It brings back everyone's favorite vampire, Dracula, who is now part of a futuristic police force called Monster Vice (attached to the Los Angeles Police Department).  Except, he has rearranged the lettering in his name and is known to friends and enemies alike as Curadal.  He teams up with the story's alcoholic hero - a veteran of Monster Vice - to expunge the plague of monsters that run endemic in the world.  Dick Pitts has a myriad of problems - the drink, a bad attitude, an odd relationship with a murdered prostitute who haunts him in a very sweet way, and the fact that he's been 'bit' by a vampire, and is constantly susceptible to turning 'fang'. His only deterrent is activating a neuropeptide in his body, called Prolactin.  This component exists for real (google it) and is produced during orgasm.  Thus, Pitts must either auto-stimulate himself to ejaculation every 24 hours, or be assisted by some sympathetic young woman to achieve the same result.  It sounds easy, but Pitts is always getting into trouble and oftentimes forgets about this prophylactic necessity to warding off vampirism.

Monster Vice is a horror story, but my readers will laugh outright in many places.  Free promo this Wednesday and Thursday, April 18 and 19.  Enjoy.

Monday, April 16, 2012

A Man and his Dog

For the past year and a half, I have come to know an old, homeless man (whose name I never got) who is accompanied by an old dog (whose name I did get -- Bullet).  Bullet was by no means named for his fleetness of paw and spirit.  He looked like a cross between a pit-bull and a lab, and limped noticeably.  He clearly had considerable age in his hind-quarters, and was never able to keep up in stride to the old man.  Whether the old man was Bullet's owner, or simply a companion ... I may never learn.  The old man is semi-articulate, a product I imagine of combined age and mental degradation; I do know that the old fellow is not drug addicted nor a drunk.  He simply wanders the neighborhood, and he and the old dog sleep together out in the open.

I write about this duo because I was touched by the simplicity of their daily lives, at least as they respectively appeared to me.  The old man walked, the old dog followed.  They stopped on occasion, rested, ate and drank (the old man enjoyed the occasional Dr. Pepper I proffered). 

One day, I found a very touching sight:  the old man was cleaning old Bullet's ears.  Bullet, in his dog-like way, semi-growled appreciation -- itchy ears for a dog is a bitch to deal with; I know this from owning a German Shepherd for ten years, and nothing he liked better than a good scratch, Ringo did he!  The old man cared for the old dog much in the way an old man might care for his equally aged wife, or vice versa.  Some would say that perhaps the relationship between man and dog was symbiotic merely; the man needed the dog for company, the dog needed the man for food, water, and the irrevocable ear-scratch.  It is not a theory I buy.  I feel, though I have heard the old man grumble at Bullet on occasion, calling him 'slow-poke' and 'old cur', that the fellow really loves the dog. And in his inarticulate way, the dog, Bullet, loves the man in return.  What they have, I believe, is more than what many folks have in a lifetime.

And then one day ... Bullet disappeared.  I found the old man, who I had occasionally given money to, or bought something for he and Bullet in the past, outside of a 7/11 near my house.  I asked where Bullet was.  The old man simply waved off the question, as if dismissing me for my presumption and curiosity.  I have not seen Bullet since.  Was he dead?  Had man and dog simply separated, and is Bullet now on his own, or worse, consigned to the pound?

It may not be a tragic ending.  But I do not know.  The old man is not forthcoming with what has happened to his canine companion.  Bullet remains MIA.  And I am saddened by his absence.  I can only hope that one day, he reappears ... for now, he exists only in my memories.

Monday, April 9, 2012

To you Kitty, Lou Diamond living on the edge!

Though Gray Area has been published now on Amazon for a few months, it makes its formal debut into the marketplace by way of a two-day promotional, this Wednesday and Thursday, April 11 and 12.  It is a dark, brooding piece about a former Marine/Lawyer who now works undercover for one of the LAPD's violent crime divisions.  He takes on the job of trying to find out who killed two attorneys in his brother's law firm, and meets one of the feistiest vixens since Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct.  I've converted the book into a script, and am having the agents concurrently market it with the intro of the book.

Gray Area was a very personal novel for me.  My main character is severely alcoholic, and I myself have wrestled with the 'gentle grape', as 'twere.  He has lost his wife in the most pedestrian of ways - killed while taking cash from an ATM - and cannot even function around his very young daughter due to his grief.  He's able to keep his job because he goes deep undercover on missions where primarily he has to look like a drug addicted and/or drunken loser.  There is no humor in this for him - he understands what he does best:  To nail bad guys by being among them.  The story's opening sequence inspired me because, as a former paralegal, I worked in a firm where two attorneys were caught - and fired - for aardvarking in the library. 

The novel uncharacteristically took two years to write, and is not for the squeamish.  There is a sex scene in the book that will not quickly be forgotten.  I plan on a sequel to this book, because, as you will discover, Lou Diamond is a fascinating example of a life gone terribly wrong, but even so, a life that struggles to stay relevant and meaningful.

I dedicated this book to the special woman in my life who continually reminds me daily that I am special to her and continually pushes me to capture the life of the character and go for more.  To you, Kitty!

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

My Mom Made Me Do It, Officer!

The Last ElF
The Last Elf, though on Amazon/Kindle now for about a month, has not really been given a proper birthing by way of a free download day ... or much mention on my part at all.  No particular reason for this, other than this is a little experimental gem I created awhile back which I shall follow closely in the marketplace.  Experimental, I say, because I mainly devote myself to adult science-fiction and genre fiction (with the occasional non-fiction entry into the world).

My mother was so enamored of the Harry Potter phenomenon that she would harass me continually with dog-chase phrases like "Why can't you write something that child-friendly?" or "That Harry Potter stuff is so sweet" or my personal favorite "All you write about, George, is vampires, killing and outer space."  True, mom, you had me there. 

What I'm most pleased about in The Last Elf, though I kept it focused in the world of children, and from a young adult's perspective, I believe I retained a certain darkness to my piece which is endemic to the human condition.  Children die in this book - at least so my little child-ghost, Jennifer tells the world.  Elves were butchered long ago by the Dark Elf. And there are lessons of self-sacrifice that even children must embrace, sometimes at an early age ... and when least convenient or expected.

My mom passed away August 13, 2009, but her prodding and wishes prevailed, and she was able to read The Last Elf when I finished it just a short time before her death.  I never really tried to market it after publication.  Now with the advent of Amazon/Kindle (at least to me) my little tween fantasy of elves, brain-eating snakes, a friendly and grumpy dragon called a Bandanglesnort, and a capricious wizard, comes to full circle. I hope that all of you enjoy it as much as my mom did.  Thanks for the read.